Kill someone. Just kidding! This post is an effort in avoiding that! I mean if this were an alternate universe where you could purge, go for Donald Trump. Could you imagine though??? Your mood would ultimately boost after you’re named an American hero with your face on the hundred dollar bill, a star on Hollywood and Vine, and your face on the cover of a magazine of your choice. I’d choose to be on the cover Vogue with Kathy Griffin with the headline reading: Hero’s ahead of their time.
Why are you in a bad mood? Is it because the wait for your Starbucks drink was unbearable? Is it because too many bitches and not enough hoes out there? Is it they had a medium and not a small?
There’s a solution for everything. If you have the money for it of course. Like why wait for coffee when you can make your own? With your 1k espresso machine that does it all. Or get a sex toy! I heard those are great. Get the sparkly dildo, not the bedazzled one (that one hurts). Or gain the weight and fit into a medium. There ain’t nothing wrong with extra jelly.
The point is, think. Think why you’re in a mood and do something about it. Think of a cost effective solution and act upon it.
If analyzing doesn’t solve the issue, then you’re screwed. Just kidding! I’m such a jokester today. Too funny.
Do something. Listen to your favorite music. Listen to some new music. I recommend Friday by Rebecca Black, God is A Woman by Ariana (god) Grande, and Fernando by Cher and Andy Garcia.
But you can also do some exercise. Go for a run down. A walk. That’s all I can recommend. Exercising isn’t my cup of ice cream.
Or as a favorite vine one said, “Be yourself, Bitch! Step your pussy up, honey! Get a job! Own a business! Bitch, suck a dick!” -TS Madison.
Hopefully doing something else gets your mind off whatever got you in a bad mood
Watch or do whatever makes you laugh. What I do to help me boost my mood is watch The Office, watch the same Tiffany Haddish late night interviews, watch a Ali Kong special, or read my local comedy newspaper: Twitter.
Look at me being inspirational and shit. Where is my motivational speaking tour?
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